Fostering Healthy Relationships

Are ways to make your relationships with family and friends better included on your New Year’s resolutions list?

With the New Year just beginning, I was thinking about what is most important. After God—for me—it is friends and family. Do we cherish and foster these relationships as we should or do we treat the shop assistant and hairdresser with more respect? Think about it!
Do you yell at your mum and dad, but when a friend calls on the phone you answer all sweet and caring? If your sibling comes into the room to borrow a book, do you make it look as if they are hassling you, but a friend asks the same favour and you can’t help quick enough?
Often we treat the people who are closest to us and we love the most with the least respect and kindness.
Maybe we think they will never reject us and therefore take our relationship with them for granted. Maybe we don’t realise how lucky we are to have these people in our lives. Many are not so fortunate.
Here are some ways we can make sure we are fostering considerate, healthy, happy relationships with family and friends:

• Find out what people’s love languages are. The five usual ones are gifts (don’t have to be expensive), quality time (this isn’t sitting in front of the TV), words of affirmation, doing things (mowing the lawn for Dad or assisting someone with homework) and physical touch (hugs, holding hands, pats on the back).
• Make sure you always show your appreciation for the small things and say thank you.
• Don’t be afraid to say sorry when you have hurt someone’s feelings. This shows you have humility and can admit your wrongs.
• If you say you are going to do something, follow through.
• Don’t promise things just to be accepted, when you definitely know you can’t follow through.
• Remember, when you lie, you will always be found out.
• Don’t talk behind each other’s backs. Otherwise those people might turn around and talk behind your back.
• Make sure it is a two-way relationship. This means the receiving and giving is equal.
• Keep the information people tell you confidential. Be a friend that is reliable.
• Most of all, the golden rule applies. Be the kind of person to others that you would want others to be to you!

Sometimes friendships come about for a short time to fulfil a purpose, and sometimes long friendships fade away. Check the list above and make sure you are treating the people closest to you in a loving manner. Also, check they are treating you how you would like to be treated. Let’s make this year’s goal to cherish the people who are the most important to us.